Nicknames
by sleepychocolatecloud
Summary: When out on a day of shopping, a series of events cause Rouge and Shadow to seek shelter on Angel Island. While the red haired guardian is away, the pair take certain privileges. When they stumble upon a journal filled with hilarious nicknames, their day takes a turn for better. Rated T for profanity and jokes that are not kid friendly.


_Well, this is a thing._ "Robust-A-Nut Nick."

 _Oh my..._

"A.K.A I want some Egghead, or should I say I want some Rotten Egg Pussy."

 _Now **this** is interesting._

"Stiletto the Fuckboi- _wait. What the hell?"_

He froze, eyeing the journal like it was a piece of garbage and he was getting ready to chaos blast it into outer space; if he could. "Why did you stop Shadow? It was getting good." I pouted, waiting for him to continue reading the journal of my favorite hot headed echidna. Instead of reading the rest, he simply closed his eyes, shut the journal, and threw it out of a nearby window that just so happened to be opened. "Come on! Why did you have to do that?" My hands were on my hips and burning to grab him to give his neck a good shake. It was raining outside; he threw one of the _most precious jewels_ I have ever found into a puddle. Probably a muddy puddle at that.

The ebony hedgehog grabbed the towel that he had hanging on his shoulders before he looked up at me and furrowed his brows. Those blood red eyes of his were cutting like daggers. "That trash contained tasteless humor. It had to be disposed of." He wiped beads of water off of his pointed quills.

"Disposed of?" I mimicked. "Hun, **you** **laughed** at that 'tasteless humor'. Remember Metal Sonic's nicknames." He turned his head away from me, dodging my statement. "What about 'Optimus Crime' or 'Identity Crisis the Vibrator- The only toy that will help you discover your body. Does not come with batteries.'?" His chest suddenly contracted, trying to suppress his laughter. Sure enough, his trademark straight face transformed into his "I'm still edgy but at least the ten foot pole has been removed from my ass." face.

I sigh, the ink is probably running down the shriveled pages now. It would be pointless to try to run out and grab the journal. Shame it had to go to waste, it was our only source of entertainment. It's funny how we got here actually. Shadow and I were heading home from a mall close to Station Square due to an incident that involved Shadow rough housing with a certain blue hedgehog. The two completely ruined my dress for a ball everyone was invited to. The higher-ups, government officials, even celebrities will all be there. So to show off how amazing my sense of fashion is, I picked out special fabrics and jewels to make the best dress. Unfortunately, it was in vain due to high testosterone leading to prove who can kick who's ass. Hell, I almost kicked their ass, but the adorable innocent look on Sonic's face and the promises of Shadow made me forgive them.

Anyways, we waltzed out of the mall when SHWOOSH some random bird came out of nowhere and flew off with my bags. Shadow and I chased after it, also in vain. We couldn't keep track of the damn thing and we ended up in the middle of God knows where. To our luck, Shadow left his chaos emerald at the house and it began to pour down like no tomorrow. Like the gentleman he is, Shadow took off the coat he was wearing and let me wear it while he got drenched. He said it was going to rain earlier, but I didn't listen to him. It was a clear sunny day when we left for the mall! While Shadow was prepared with this heavy (but surprisingly comfortable) gray coat, black long sleeve muscle shirt, beige cargo pants, and black steel toed combat boots. Myself on the other hand was nowhere close to prepared with a mini tan pencil skirt, a yellow off the shoulders blouse, and brown thigh high heeled boots.

This was an utterly miserable experience until we spot a familiar floating island while roaming for shelter. In this case, we were able to find a _furnished_ shelter.

Angel Island proved to come in handy for other purposes than holding the beautiful Master Emerald and housing the target of all my flirting and teasing.. **Hm**. Once we got onto the island via mystical waterfall-elevator, we had another dilemma. The echidna installed alarms. In fear of accidentally awakening a pissed water god, we did the only thing we could of done; break into Knuckles' house. _We literally broke the door_. Knuckles can't get mad; if you don't want people to rummage your house while you aren't home, _don't leave your house_.

It was upsetting to find out that Knucklehead wasn't here after all we went through to get here. Until I found that journal while getting towels for Shadow. At first I thought it would contain juicy secrets. Shadow even jokes that it might be Knuckles' confessions of love for me; but what we found was way better. _Knuckles' and Sonic's Long List of Weird Nicknames For the Crew._ That was the title of the journal. Everyone that we knew had their own section of hilarious made up nicknames. That journal took my mind off of this disaster of a day, but now that literally went out of the window.

Just thinking about it is depressing. Until I can sink into my thoughts on how bad this day went, I hear the aggressive rushing of the mystical water elevator and the sounds of voices outside. Actually, two recognizable voices; one that has the voice of pure sunshine and the other a more guttural voice full of wisdom. Shadow heard this two and stopped drying himself, looking towards where the door should be. The both of us leaned forward on our seats to see the source of the two voices; Sonic and Knuckles. Oh boy.

 _This is where the fun begins._


End file.
